Friday, December 28, 2007

Catching up a bit on a number of things

In a puzzling turn of events, I have come to the conclusion that Nibbles is just fat (or perhaps also pregnant) and Bubbles is in fact the momma, although she never waxed large. I assumed Nibbles had to be the mum because she/he/it is enormous, but you know what the word assume makes. Pshaw. Well, it doesn't because it only works if you're American. Arse is the correct word, not ass, for goodness sake. Arses are hairy, brazen, meaty and goose-worthy, spankable and solid. An ass is pallid, soggy and limp, if it's anything at all.

Talking of arses, it cheered me right up to discover Blair has converted to Catholicism a while back. Living right down to my expectations.

Xmarse brought us four binbags of recycling (cardboard and paper) and two binbags of sundries and miscellanous rubbish (wires, plastics etc), which makes the outside of our house look like a mini-landfill. 'Course it's very windy today, so I suspect the whole neighbourhood may soon have a share of our cardboard booty.

And why oh why do toy manufacturers screw their toys into the cardboard? Wiring them isn't enough? Lacing them and effing sewing their hair into it isn't enough? They needs must provide you with a reason to be grateful for the tiny screwdriver set you got from a cracker last year into the bargain. I should remember next year to spend one evening removing everything from its cardboard imprisonment and the next evening wrapping it without it all, so the children can actually unwrap their presents and start to play straightaway.

I'd like to post the packaging back to the shops/factories with some choice expletives elegantly calligraphed (I know it's not a verb, but damn it, Janet, I'm going to use it like it is) thereupon.

And I was upset to learn of Benazir Bhutto's murder, although not surprised. Whatever her flaws, she represented something hopeful.

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